The Smack Down

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12:35 p.m. on a Friday afternoon, "Hello, Mrs. Hart?"

I had to stop a minute. Hmmm, no Marcella isn't here. Oh wait. That's me.

"Yes. This is Casey."

"Casey, this is Cheri from the elementary school."

And my heart skips a beat. The worry hackles go up. What's wrong? What's happened to my girls??

"We have Alex here in the Principal's office."

I remain silent.

"She's fine. She's here because there was an 'incident' on the playground. She punched a little boy in the chest, so she'll be here until the end of the day. The principal is at a meeting or he would have called you himself. He will 'deal with this' when he gets back." (That last part sounded a little ominous.)

Alex? Seriously? The girl who is "everybody's friend?"

"What? She HIT someone? What happened?" I say.

"Clearly she MUST have been provoked. Alex wouldn't just HIT someone. Not Alex," the protective mom voice echoes in my head. I, wisely, keep these thoughts to myself.

"Apparently they were all playing," Cheri explains, "and one of her friends said, 'Get all the boys out. Get all the boys off of our base!' So, Alex punched one of the boys. A second grader."

OK - is it wrong that a little piece of me was proud of her girl taking on the bigger boys?? OK, yes. Wrong.

I asked to speak with Alex on the phone, and she was sooo upset by the whole thing, I couldn't understand her through her tears.

"OK - babe. I'm coming down to the school so we can talk about it - OK? I'll be there in 10 minutes."

Once I got to the school, she looked at me with those big brown eyes, as sad as I've ever seen them, and began to cry again. I sat and held her until she calmed down enough to tell me what had happened, which was pretty much what Cheri had already told me.

It was one of those tough times in parenting when you really just want to let them off the hook. She was sad, embarrassed and clearly remorseful. She wanted me to take her home.

Sorry, sweetie. These are the lumps and you've got to take them. Consequences for poor choices. This is how we learn. Mommy's heart hurts for you - but it is what it is. Hitting is never OK.

So we sat and talked about why it was wrong, why hitting is never OK, and alternate choices that she can make in the future. Then I helped her write this note:
After school I spoke with her teacher and the principal, and they were as surprised as I that Alex ended up in the principal's office. Apparently there's been a run of "good kids gone bad" in the past week, so "we're not alone."

Hmmm, not sure that makes the situation any better, but it does make me wonder what's going on - as it does the principal apparently. A week of 95 degrees + may have something to do with it. But whatever it is - we don't want to see one of these again


After I told all of this to Dave and commiserated over the fall of our 'perfect child,' he asked, "After all that, did you tell her that sometimes 2nd grade boys are wusses? Especially when they get beat up by a little 1st grade girl?"

Yeah, I think a little piece of him was secretly proud of his tough little girl too.
**

Just another step

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Today I watched her walk away. Without so much as a glance backwards, she walked away. Tentative, a little slowly at first, but off she went with dozens of other little people. Rachel left.

The second day of kindergarten is always rougher (for me) than the first. Day one is filled with excitement over new clothes, new backpacks and school supplies, new experiences, but day two they just walk away. Another step on the long road toward their own life, toward adulthood, and one more step away from needing mommy and daddy for every little thing.

Oh, I've been told that once they head off to college that I'll be ready to see them go, but I don't think so. My heart hurts a little when I think of the ways we'll grow apart from them as they grow up. It's natural. It's necessary. I know all that, and I want that for them. I just hope we can somehow keep them close while simultaneously letting them grow, and ultimately letting them go.

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Day 1

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Rachel's Special Day

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Rachel's graduation from preschool marked the end of her toddlerhood, the end of her baby days. She's now, officially, a little girl-bright, fiercely independent, strong, and soft and cuddly. My little-little girl is growing up way before I'm ready.

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A weekend guest...,

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Each week Curious George visits one of Alex's classmates. This past week was her turn, and she was over the moon for the little guy...,

~Click on image to enlarge~

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The Big Drop

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Oh the creativity! I thought for sure we'd see a collection of parent-made egg protectors. I was happily proven wrong, and we saw an incredible array of kid ingenuity!!

Alex's little friend, Emelia created a rocket ship with a parachute and it worked great!

Softly and slowly sailing to the ground.

There were boxes filled with a variety of protection schemes; an open packing box filled with cotton, a plastic bag filled with water, one big bag of Rice Crispy cereal...,
socks filled with batting, bubble wrap everywhere, and even a little steel wool!

Oh - yes and let's not forget the GRAPE FRUIT!! "Well, I had a grape fruit, and I don't really like grape fruits so we put the egg in the grape fruit, used some tape-lots of tape, bubble wrap and some bath toys." (And we were all surprised when that egg broke!)

Alex and Daddy worked together to create a net in a box. An ingenious masterpiece. And then...,

The BIG drop

Oh NO!

Better luck next time.

**

Donuts with Dad

**That's my adorable hubby and my precious little girl. How cute are they? Thanks TBES!

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Day 2: Our New Reality

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Day two was rough. The build-up, excitement and photos were gone. The reality that this was it, for the next 12 years and beyond, the girls will have another life.

From today forward, Dave and I will be on the periphery. No longer the center of their world. No longer will we have full knowledge of what goes on in their lives - just bits of what they tell us after hours outside of our protective reach.

I dropped Alex at kindergarten and Rachel at preschool with the usual hugs, kisses and smiles. I returned to my car, tears welling up in my eyes.

My two little caterpillars have left their cocoons.

**

There she goes...

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The first day of kindergarten went off without a hitch. No tears, no whining or clinging - all smiles and excitement. But enough about me, Alex did great too!

We arrived early, camera in hand, and walked Alex onto school grounds.

She found her friends and off she went - whoo hoo! Play time!! Her first experience with recess was a BIG success, and Momma was reassured that she'd survive - at least that 1st day.

We took the obligatory 1st day pictures, cheered her on, kisses and hugs all around...,

and away she went, her 1st day of school...,

My little-big girl. Confident and strong.

A proud, happy sigh - heavy with nostalgia.

How did this happen? How did we get here soooo quickly, and how do I slow down the clock?

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Mommy and Daddy Go To School

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The night before Alex started kindergarten, Dave and I went to our first teacher/parent conference. A bit intimidating in that we had no idea what to expect, and, on some level, doubted our ability and/or knowledge about "what's best" when it comes to educating our children.

Looking around the room it was easy to pick out the first time parents—all so eager, sitting up straight, paying attention, punctuating the discussions with nervous laughter.

The veterans were all much more easy going—almost smug (ok—not true. I'm just envious at their apparent confidence that this will all work out and that our kids will survive and thrive).

We began to relax a bit as Miss Frobie explained her approach to teaching and the unique details of the kindergarten/1st grade combo class. That is until she put up the daily schedule—"that's too much, she's only five! She's my baby. And my baby is growing up—growing up beautiful." I was oozing with love and pride, and a little apprehension, for my little-big girl.

I turned around and looked at my husband. His eyes were moist and red, he was getting all choked up listening as the principal and kindergarten teacher laid out the schedule and the program for the coming year.

So proud, he was beaming.

God, I LOVE that man!

As much as I love my girls, I know he matches that bond in a visceral way and they are so blessed to have such a great daddy.

I 've heard that the most important relationship that a young girl can have is with her Daddy. If this is true—my girls are all set to rock the world.

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